7 Habits Continued

Habit 4:  Think Win-Win
This habit is based on the principle that good, lasting relationships have mutual respect and benefit.  This does not mean that everyone can always "win."  Notice it is called "think win-win."  The concept of "win-win" was a little difficult for me to grasp at first, because if you think very literally "win-win" rarely (if ever) happens. Then I realized what made the difference is what you define as a "win."  What you consider a victory, is often dependent on your values (identified and realized in Habits 1-3).  The real goal of habit 4 is to consider others before yourself, to stop and THINK of others before yourself. THINK win-win.  So perhaps (if I had authored the book), I would have named habit 4 something else for better clarity (but I didn't--and I'm not rewriting the book).  The principle of habit 4 is evident in scripture. To me the banner verse for Habit4 is Matthew 7:12: "So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you..."  Christ did the ultimate "win-win" when He put himself on the cross.  He "won" the victory over sin and death and we "won" salvation! As a Christian, my desire is to be Christ-like.  Philippians 2:3-5 "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility considers other better than yourselves.  Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.  Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus."

Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood
I believe Habit 4 and 5 work hand-in-hand.  Habit 5 is specific to communication.  James 1:19 says "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry..." Habit 5 is built around listening first, with the intent to understand- not to reply.  Most people (myself included) are ready to reply when conversing with others.  Sometimes, we are so ready to reply, that we miss what the person is really saying (especially when the conversations are emotionally intense).  If I were to quickly listen, rather than quickly speak, I would be much more "effective" in my responses.  Words are so important.  They last in our memories.  They can have multiple meanings, depending on how they are delivered and received.  So, not only does and effective communicator listen first, but they also respond thoughtfully.  I want to be more "slow to speak" so that I am more intentional and thoughtful in my response.  Some of my deepest regrets are words that I have spoken harshly or angrily.  Words that I spoke too soon, without  thought.  My hope is that as I grow and mature "May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer." Psalms 19:14.  

Habit 6: Synergize
This is based on the idea that we need others and others need us!  "The whole is greater than the sum of its parts."  God is relational and we too (created in His image) are relational.  It based around the idea that together, we don't have to compromise, but rather form a better way.  Proverbs 15:22 says "Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed."  The challenge hear is to seek counsel.  Don't be afraid to work with others, to seek counsel.  Everyone has different strengths and when we share them with each other in life, we all become more effective.  Effective people, don't act alone.  God even desires His people, His kingdom, His church to operate this way:  "Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good." 1 Corinthians 12:7.  The challenge here is to be used for the "common good."  That's why I feel as a Christian, it's important to be part of a body of believers.  To be a part of the "common good," you must first have a common vision and purpose.  The church exsists to fulfill God's vision and purpose.  "All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation..." 2 Corinthians 5:18.   Christians working together are more effect in the "ministry of reconciliation".

Habit 7: Sharpen The Saw
This habit is about renewal, continuous improvement, and conflict prevention. Sharpen The Saw encircles all the other habits and bleeds into them.  This is also what day to day living for Christ is about.  Romans 12:2 says "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." 2 Corinthians 4: 16 "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day."  By reading God's word daily, praying, repenting, and working together with other Christains we are renewed and changed to be more like Christ.  I believe practicing forgiveness is a HUGE part of sharpening the saw.  There is no better way to prevent conflict and renew your soul than to forgive (and be forgiven).  Our presenter used the illustration of "pre-forgiveness."  He said a boss told a new-hire "You are pre-forgiven.  I know you will make mistakes.  The only thing I ask is, two things.  1- Tell me when you do. 2- Teach me (tell me how we can avoid the mistake in the future)."  I think that's exactly what Christ did for me.  I want to do that for others as well.  These two verses are good backing for this practice of forgiveness and repentance:  James 1:19, "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Ephesian 4:32, "Turn from evil and do good, seek peace and pursue it." Psalms 34:14

So, that's my thoughts on the 7 Habits.  Now it's time for me to make them just that--habits!